Immunity for All Crimes Obama Committed

Jul 23, 2013 by

Considering the innumerable scandals overshadowing President Obama’s two terms, one would think Americans would be all too eager to cast the arrogant ruler by the wayside.

Rather, as author and political activist Mark Dice illustrates, Americans seem to be reaching new sycophantic heights in demonstrating their enamored, undeterred faith in the murderous tyrant’s dictatorial reign.

Dice once again takes to California’s sunny beaches and effortlessly proceeds to gather a multitude of signatures for a fictitious petition seeking to grant the president immunity for crimes he commits while in office.

“We just need to get behind the president and show that we will grant him immunity for any crimes that he may have committed,” Dice tells one distracted beach cyclist.

Dice then thanks the cyclist for her signature, to which she supplies an enthusiastic, “No problem.”

“I’m sure that he’s had a good reason for doing those things… Just, you know, we need to get behind the president no matter what he does, right?” Dice inquires of another person.

“Yes,” another distracted beach-goer blithely replies.

Dice also played up the race card, saying, “I mean, Obama deserves immunity and anybody that tries to charge him with a crime is obviously a racist of some kind.”

“Right,” another signer wholeheartedly agrees.

“Basically… we’re just gonna make sure that Obama can get away with whatever he wants to, just like you can get away with having that doobie right now,” he jokes to a beach-faring, pot-smoker signing the petition.

The sheer ease by which Dice is able to garner signatories simply by mentioning the name Obama is astounding, but his petition signers’ lack of perspicacity is in no way a fluke or accident.

As Dice demonstrated last May at San Diego State University, Americans are extremely willing to sacrifice privacy and their Fourth Amendment rights for security.

Following the Boston Marathon bombings, Dice was able to find students willing to submit to random bag searches so long as he prefaced it by saying he was conducting the searches as part of Obama’s citizen security volunteer force.

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